THE TORTURE OF KIDS

I was telling a friend I met down the playground yesterday how tough I'm finding being mum to 3 very demanding kids at the moment. 

She told me an interesting fact her doctor had told her. That of a survey of stressful jobs including pilots, firemen and doctors, mums came out on top as being the most stressful profession. 

I'm certainly feeling that right now. 

I feel like the kids have turned on me, realising my weaknesses and raising their demands 20-fold. Screaming is now the only way they ask for something. The older two have regressed to copying their baby brother who screams all the time to get my attention. 

So every minute someone is screaming at me. They know it works - it gets my attention (eventually and in a bad way). It also frazzles my nerves and makes my blood boil.

I hate screaming. I hate noise. 

This is what rocks me to my very core.

It's like torture. Non-stop, day-in-day-out torture. 

Interspersed by tiny pockets of joy at their achievements and seeing them play together. But mostly it's me telling them to stop doing something that could potentially hurt or kill them. Or asking them to do something 10 times, before I raise my voice out of frustration. 

There's a reason why the military uses the noise of children to crack prisoners. 

Last week I felt I was cracking up. This week, after going back on the vitamin D tablets to give me inner sun and Evening Primrose to balance my hormones, I'm feeling a bit better. 

Plus my husband has been around more to help, which has been wonderful. We had a lovely party day for our little girl who turned 3 on Monday, and even got to the beach during a rare glimpse of Irish sun yesterday. 

So I'm taking the rough with the smooth, survival on a daily basis. 

I have a hundred other things I should be doing right now rather than typing on my laptop, but who cares. This week is about trying to regain a sense of 'Me'. 

Even if the pile of laundry behind me is now as big as me, I don't care. 

I'm getting out. There's another rare sighting of sun out of the window so I'm heading out to meet friends for a picnic. Gotta make the most of these breaks in the rain.